Becoming a Woman of Wisdom and Grace

The daily life, struggles and victories of a Godly Woman.

  • Don’t be Salty

    Don’t be Salty

    I haven’t posted in awhile. Life has been rough to say the least. But here we are at the beginning of a new year. So why not leave everything behind and start fresh!

    Lately the story of Lot’s wife has been everywhere around me. I’ve thought about it, seen it on my feeds and people tell me things that correlate with the story. I even started looking into where they think they found the place his wife was turned to salt.

    Genesis 19 is a great story about not looking back. We have all heard the story of Sodom and Gamorrah. These two cities were filled with sin and God destroyed them. Before He did that though, he warned Lot and his family to flee by sending an Angel. They were specifically told not to look back, to go to the mountains and turn from their wicked ways. God had a big plan to bring them out of destruction and into a life following Him. As they were fleeing, Lots wife looked back. She didn’t just look at the distraction though, she looked back at where her life was and how she missed it. As soon as she did that she was turned into a pillar of salt.

    Lets take away a few things from this. She was living in sin, God wanted Lot’s entire family out to save them and she looked back longingly for what she had there. This shows disobedience, weak faith and attachment to worldly things. So she was turned into something that erodes things, salt.

    In Luke 17:32-33 it tells us “Remember Lot’s wife. Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it; and whosoever shall lose his life shall preserve it.”

    We have to be willing to let everything go to follow Him. If not we will slowly erode and become bitter about losing the past things like how salt makes things bitter over time. Instead we should embrace where He is taking us on our journey. Trust the process because He doesn’t always give you everything you want, but he makes sure to give you what you need.

    I love how this story is perfect for the New Year. Jesus has laid it on my heart for about a month now to dig deeper in this. He wanted me to be prepared to leave things in the past today, to move forward and not live there. Believe me when I say, this month has not been easy. Challenges come when change in about to happen. Its testing you to see if you are ready.

    Isaiah 43;18-19 states ” But forget all that… it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.

    I’m not sure about other places but in the south we have traditions of eating certain foods for “good luck” in the New Year. I don’t really believe in the sayings but the whole meal is just kind of a comfort to me. We do greens, cornbread, black-eyed peas and pork of some kind. Each thing has its own meaning and there are different variations of how eating each one will bring you this or that in the New Year, but the only one I really liked to think about is the new fact my mom told me today about the pork. We eat pork in the New Year because Pigs/Hogs only graze forward, never backward. They show us that you should only move forward in life. I thought that was so cool how I have been thinking about this today and she told me that fact, it made it all come together. (Moms have a way of doing that lol)

    In the end, don’t be Salty and move forward. God will put the things in front of you that you need. Go to those things. Don’t look back at the past because those are just worldly wants and not what you need to grow.

  • Boundaries

    Boundaries

    There are four different areas of life that we need boundaries, your personal, with our friends, relationship and having respect for others boundaries. These all build a solid foundation. If you can plant these well in your life, your can be sure they will grow in the direction you are heading.

    For me, I want my boundaries to lead me closer to Jesus as well as show others I am on that path. Lets be honest though, its easier said than done. Your boundaries have to align with your daily life. You cant just tell people your boundaries, they have to see them. In doing these, I hope to gain more self-control, respect for others limits and ultimately honor Gods rules for us.

    As I researched I found that there are three C’s to boundaries. It starts with being clear about what you can or cannot do, being consistent and not letting go of what you have worked hard to achieve and making sure these boundaries are communicated well with the people they need to be. I found these three things helpful in the fact that we cant let go of our boundaries in any of these areas because either we wont take ourselves seriously or the people they are being communicated wont take us seriously.

    So lets get into the first one. Personal boundaries are hard because we want to lead with our emotions and not what God says we should do. In Proverbs 4:23 the Bible is telling us to “guard our heart” because it knows that our emotions come from there. Its something we always have to be watchful of. The saying of “don’t let your emotions get the best of you” comes to mind.

    Our world today tells us to do what we feel or go where your heart leads, but the Bible says “the heart is deceitful” in Jeremiah 17:9. It goes on to talk about how can we trust what its saying? We cant, so we need boundaries set it place for ourselves first as to not be pulled into a worldly view again.

    My boundaries will look different than yours and we will all have many. One of mine that has come to mind is how much I share with others. Its a boundary that I have struggled with in the past. Have you ever felt like you told someone a little too much one day and then regretted it directly after? It used to send me into a spiral of thoughts. Now though, I have learned to be more quiet. I listen more to what others are saying and it helps me gauge their true intentions towards me personally.

    I practice the three C’s well here by asking the first question, moving the questions along to direct the conversation and direct questions back to them after giving them short answers about myself. This shouldn’t be confused with judgement because its not that at all. I am working towards trusting people and in the professions that I am in, too much information about myself could lead to things I don’t want to invite into my life.

    Next is boundaries with our friends. How many times have you bent on things with friends because you enjoy hanging around them or they are very convincing? For me, so many times. We have to set boundaries in every aspect of our life and make sure we are using those three C’s to help us hold to them. Our friends are no exceptions.

    Life is hard with this but your boundaries matter and friends that don’t respect that don’t need time in your life. We are all changing for better here and seeing where God leads us. So the group you are around will either bring you closer to where God leads you or push you farther away.

    Think about being invited to a party. You are there and if you are like me, I don’t drink anymore. My true friends know this is a personal and a friend boundary but I’m still invited a lot of the time lol. Usually there is one person there that will always say something about “you used to drink before”, “just one drink” or a big “come on, don’t be a buzz kill.” This is where your boundaries have to be clearly communicated. In my case I can list off the many reasons I choose not to and kind of make it uncomfortable for them or I can say a polite no again and walk away. I find the polite no works well with just removing yourself from the situation all together. In Proverbs 22:3 it tells us prudent people see the things as they are and take refuge (me walking away) and the naive person stays in the conversation (giving all my reasons) and suffers the consequences. Using this Proverb as an example gives you the wise choice of showing people you wont bend. It shows them you are serious about your boundaries and it communicates it well with little words or judgement towards them. That is a ministry in itself when they see how you chose to remove yourself from the situation rather than escalate it.

    Lets move on to relationships. I personally have struggled with this for so long. Reminder to myself of Proverbs 4:23 again. Partners have a hold on each other that no one else does or really should have. They know your “buttons to push” as well as where you will bend and ultimately break on things. This is why we need boundaries. The three C’s come into play here the most. We must make our boundaries clear to ourselves first, be consistent in them and then to our partner in communication. They wont just know your boundaries because no one is a mind reader, but once you tell them, they will respect them or they wont.

    Boundaries in relationships hold us accountable to each other. They say, I respect my partner by not doing this or that because they have boundaries in place for their reasons even if it doesn’t fully make sense to me. This is the biggest area our Proverbs 31 woman comes into play in this. I mean, she has all of these boundaries laid out for everyone but ultimately she is a wife. Her husband respects her. He isn’t out looking for attention from others because he has it from her. She isn’t out looking for attention from others because she has it from him. If either of them feel a lack of attention then they pray about it. This is the relationship goal. Turning to God when you feel your partner isn’t in the place they should be.

    In my professions, I have to talk to a lot of people, a lot of the time. My relationship boundaries come into play here. I do these things without too much extra information. Too much information about your partner or relationship to others and people think that they have a say in your life. Im clear that I have a partner, consistent with staying on subjects that don’t dive too deep into life and I communicate that my family life is a light topic, not a deep one. This way, I avoid a lot of unwanted advice and drama. Proverbs 10:19 which says “restraining your lips is prudent” and that is what we want to be.

    Now we should shift it a little. Our boundaries in relationships also involve other people. They need to know what is and is not appropriate towards either of us. Your partner and yourself should have clear boundaries that you agree on and that is how you should handle outside interactions. Not everyone is respectful of relationships these days and it makes it hard. So, pray about it and seek Gods guidance on how to move together when other outside influences think it should be differently. My partner knows I am committed and would never do anything or give anyone else the idea that there is an opening somewhere.

    In our world today, they say to “keep your options open” and to “not put all your eggs in one basket.” To me, those things are great advice for business and job opportunities but not for your personal relationship. For me and mine, I want all of our eggs in one basket, no options open, solid on where we stand as a family unit. There are no openings here and I am Clear, Consistent and Committed to letting people know that. In Genesis 2:24 it shows us how we are two people moving as one flesh, each doing our own part to make it work. There is no room for others there.

    Our last and final thing is respecting other peoples boundaries. How can we lead by example if we aren’t doing the thing we are asking for? So give the respect to others of their clear boundaries and don’t question them. Use the Golden Rule of “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

    Personally I want others to respect my boundaries and if they are clear with me on theirs I will respect it. I wont push and I wont preach if you are clear you don’t want that. I will lead by example though and you can watch God move in my life that way.

    The last one was simple and to the point, no need to drag it out. Just do things for others in a way you would want them to do for you. Respect each others boundaries and yourself and live a life worthy of Gods grace and mercy.

  • Overcoming Your Past

    Overcoming Your Past

    You are worthy!

    We are all created in Gods image. Your worth is not based on your performance. Gods love is unconditional. The mistakes you make don’t change that God made you with inherent dignity and value. We cant base our value on achievements or failures, its only based on His love for us and price He paid. No matter what past you have, Gods love is always there.

    Its been a little over a year since my baptism. I had things in my past that I thought didn’t matter, that I didn’t really take care of myself the way I should have. I felt like I wasn’t worthy of God, but I also looked at it like I was worthy in the worlds eyes.

    My life was very fast pace before. After acting how I wanted in high school to being with someone for years in a life I thought was love but ended in deep therapy sessions. I had one daughter, a divorce and string of past mistakes. Then falling right back into patterns of how I knew I wanted to be treated but I didn’t act the way I should have to make that happen. I met the person I am with now.

    We didn’t start off the best way and that is probably why we have had such a rough road. There was nothing serious when we met, but then I wanted something serious. He played along with it but wasn’t fully there. Then I got pregnant. That slowed everything down for me. I wanted more for my life, to have my family, change myself and work on my relationship with God.

    In our life, we don’t think about how past decisions can affect our future self. We are called to be like Christ and fall short of that daily. However, I’m so glad that God is not holding us to a specific time frame or way to get things right with Him. His grace and mercy are what gets us back on track after going through bad times.

    He is always there watching and waiting. Giving you choices to make and see how and where you are at in your relationship with Him. To see us seriously seeking Him, not just asking for forgiveness after the fact and then going to do it again.

    With our worldly view, we like to look at peoples past as who they are. Have you ever stopped to think though that who they were in the past isn’t who they are now? I mean yes, some things they might still be working on, but that is them with God, being better every day. Once we are saved we are set free of the chains we have. Do we not owe it to others to see how God is working in their life as well?

    Yes! Everyone deserves to be seen for where they are at now and not by their past. If they are moving forward every day with God, we should be sending thankful prayers up for them. If we see them backsliding, we should send up strengthening prayers for them. No need to even tell them you saw and are praying, just little bits of encouraging talk like “I’ve seen your progress” or “Look at you and God go.”

    Because just like everyone, we all have to keep praying for each other. We all have to encourage each other to reach into the word and talk to God to obtain strength to move forward.

    To do this, we have to rely on Gods strength for power to overcome the past. I talk to Him every day about mine and how I can improve as a good partner, mother and friend. Changes are sometimes small but they are always there. Now I see more clearly when I am about to backslide or when I actually do backslide. That’s where the choices come in. I look at it as “if I make this decision now, how will this go later” type of way. Its getting easier and easier to resist the temptations and know what God is calling our in my life next to be changed.

    Next we have to truly believe in our identity in Christ. Know that we are precious, chosen and complete in Him. That we are worthy in His eyes. We don’t need validation from the world. We just have to continue our work in Him.

    Embracing your purpose is the only way to fully move forward. Use your past as a way to help you. With God on your side, your life means everything. You can use your past and knowledge as a ministry for Him. Your past is no longer holding you back in the same patterns. Its helping you and others to be free and move forward.

    Sometimes we look at being a Proverbs 31 woman as an “out of our reach” type of thing. Its not though. Once you are baptized in Jesus name, your slate is wiped clean, you have been redeemed and all your chains are broken. You are free again. You have the ability to turn your life around and be that woman!

  • The Breadwinner

    The Breadwinner

    We often struggle with how the Bible says the man is “The Leader” while the wife is “The Helper”. These two things are correct but how does that play out in providing for your household?

    The world wants us to say, “women can do it all, alone.” That the woman doesn’t need a man to survive. While this can be true in many ways, its not how we were designed and destined to become. Women are the support to the man in his decisions. We have intuition about people, we see things coming and we plan ahead. Its how we are designed to be and we know how well we read people and situations. Men don’t have that, God designed us to help protect in that way.

    The Bible doesn’t say anything about women staying home and not working. It simply states that there are certain roles we have. These roles that we now refer to as “gender roles” are specifically that. Both sides have to perform their roles to make it work.

    1 TImothy 5:8 says ” If anyone does not provide for his own and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”

    Partnerships are teamwork. Making things possible. Working together to create the home and build the life that you both want. The life that God wants for you all.

    Ephesians 5:25-27 says “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it; That He might sanctify and cleanse it with washing of water by the word, That He might present it to Himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.”

    Now, the man is called to lay down his life for the wife. The wife is called to be submissive to that protection/provision. Acknowledging this will make it work. He has to be willing to die to himself in the ways of ego, pride and ambition to place the wife above those.

    1 Timothy 3:4-5 states “He must manage his own family well, with all dignity and respect, keeping his children submissive and respectful.”

    He must oversee the household. The wife helps with everything because they are a team, but he oversees it. Its just like Christ is over the Church, which is His bride. We are members doing things to help but ultimately for Christ. None of it is for personal gain, its all for living our the life God has given us and being up to the standard he expects us to be.

    The Proverbs 31 woman is an example of a woman that worked. She helped with her own money she had made. She moves to serve her husband and family to be the ultimate “helper.”

    Even if your family has gotten “off track” as they say, there is always a way. (Joel 2:25-26) God will make that way if you look to Him for guidance. It has to be your team though. Its not about who makes more, who makes less or what you bring to the table. Its about you both working together to build the table and focusing on what God will bring to it through your faithfulness.

  • Discipline

    Discipline

    Have you ever thought about how your kids see your life? Do they see you living for Christ or the world? Does it make them question what is OK and not?

    I’ve been thinking about this for awhile. Asking myself, do I start the day off with positive responses or am I negative and rushing? How can I be better at being on time and positive?

    In Proverbs 31 it shows us “She wakes up before the Sun”, “Keeps her hands busy” and “Has her affairs in order”.

    I cringe at these because these are where I have failed. One, I used to do all of these and two, I sometimes feel too tired. Its a conflict of emotions. There are times that the Lord wakes me up early and I procrastinate until I’m almost late. I let worldly thoughts and distractions shape my day.

    The truth is, we have to be disciplined in being this type of woman. The woman that is described as blessed and seeking the Lord.

    1 Corinthians 9:27 says “I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified.”

    If we are going to preach it, we have to do it, right? So this is the start of a new week and I want it to go correctly. Starting with the waking up early. I will have to start waking up about 1 hour before everyone else. This will give me time for a Bible study, time for myself and ultimately help me be in the right mindset when I wake up everyone else. To do this, I will have to be in bed earlier than I normally am now. That’s part of the discipline. Change doesn’t just affect one or two things, you have to move a lot to make things work.

    Next is keeping busy. If I am doing the things I need to, I wont have time for the extra stuff like apps, the news or even just worry. The discipline will be doing things and resisting procrastination. Maybe I should make a check off list the night before or spend a little time preparing things just so the next day I need to get it done? That’s something that works on itself if you just resist the procrastination.

    The last thing is having my affairs in order. I don’t know about you, but I feel more secure when I have the money to pay for things and all my bills are paid. Over the last month, I have struggled with “what happens next” type of attitude. I fully trust that God has a plan, but I know I also have to put in the work to make that plan happen. I’m grateful He helped me see some things coming and I was ahead of the game in this last month but now is the time for me to put in the work to continue what God has planned for me and my family.

    So with these three things I will have to use discipline to make it work. We use discipline in so many areas of our lives and don’t even think twice about it, but when it comes to taking a nap or picking up things in a room, we are tempted more to do the first thing.

    Hebrews 12:11 states “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”

    If we want to keep the life we pray for and show our kids the right path, we have to be disciplined. We have to want to grow in our faith as well as becoming a better woman. Also, we have to show our children that whatever new things are happening in the world, we still need to be faithful to the Word of God. I will be working on this moving forward and I hope you will too.

  • Healing

    Healing

    Last night I made a huge mess in my oven. Butter boiled over and missed my extra pan I placed under it to catch it. It was smokey, thick and black on the bottom. So this morning I took on the task of cleaning it. Now luckily, I have a very nice oven that has an easy clean feature. If not, I would probably still be scrubbing lol.

    While cleaning, I thought about healing. The process is rough. You want to be healed and happy so that you can go and do. But in reality, you can’t fake it. We try so hard to not show what we are going through. Put on a brave face and not let anyone see past our shield if we don’t want to let them in.

    The truth is that, our bodies can look great, our life can be going according to plan and we can be the life of the party when around others. But if we haven’t done the healing on the inside, that will all crumble at some point.

    Its kind of like cleaning my oven this morning. I had my mess from last night. I chose to pull the racks out, spray the water in there to use the easy clean feature and then scrub it clean. I had to do this about 3 times to make sure I got all of the burnt stuff out. If I wouldn’t have done it, there would have been such a much bigger mess the next time I went to cook something. There would have been smoke seeping out, butter burnt more into the bottom and it would have been tougher to clean the next time or the next, depending how long I would have waited.

    Our healing with faith is a lot like this. If we don’t do the work on the inside, it will make a bigger mess on the outside as we go along trying to pretend like life is better. Its what we call the domino effect. you can see the everything stacked perfectly and all in place but one wrong move and they all come tumbling down.

    Psalms 51:10 says “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.”

    David is asking God to create a PURE heart. One that isn’t looking back, that is moving forward. No hatred, no grief, just simply moving towards becoming who God wants him to be.

    In renewing the spirit, he is seeking the mercy and grace we talked about. Helping him to move past and renew to basically start over. People always say they wish they could start over but with the knowledge they already have about things. This is exactly that! Renewing your spirit, freeing your mind from past chains and creating a pure heart with only the best of intentions.

    Romasn 12:2 says “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is- his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

    This is such a big task. We like to carry things with us as long as possible. Hurt people the way they hurt us, do the things that everyone else is doing and ultimately living by the worlds standards instead of the Bible. But looking deeper into it, you’re not the person that hurt you and you never will be so doing to them something because they did you wrong is going to equal wrong for everyone. Two wrongs never make a right and they hardly ever help you to feel better about yourself. In doing the things everyone else is doing, we are not always the same. We are looking to serve God and be deliberate in our understand of His word.

    I’ve talked about this quote before but I’ll say it again. “don’t covet others because where the devil has them is not what God wants for you.” We are not other people. Its our job to follow Gods word and not let the devil get a hold of us. The devil will try to give you everything you want to make you happy in that instant but you will never be happy for a lifetime like you will studying and understanding Gods word.

    So when you are sitting there seeing others succeed and you feel stuck, think about how this may be where God needs you to be at that moment. How you need to trust and look to Him for guidance.

    Proverbs 18:14 states that “The human spirit can endure in sickness, but a crushed spirit who can bear?’

    Either we will trust God or turn towards the world. Our spirit and who we choose to give it to will decide. In the end, our spirit will help us through the hard times because we know there are greater times ahead.

    So to close this out, you have to heal to work towards becoming a Proverbs 31 Woman and it needs to be done from the inside out. Also, clean your oven so you don’t have a bigger mess later.

  • Redemption and Transformation

    Redemption and Transformation

    Have you ever had a bad dream that showed you something about your partners past? Like something that either you didn’t like that they have been working on or something they did that hurt you? My partner and I both like to talk about any dreams we had and how we kind of feel about them afterwards. Well we both had bad dreams last night. Both about things that the other has done or is working to be better at. Weird, right? I fully believe that the devil doesn’t target those who are already in evil but focuses on those who are trying to chase God.

    Dreams, thoughts and in general the internet can get you feeling that either you aren’t enough or your partner isn’t. Everything can be going fine, just scrolling along and one post or saying can have you asking yourself, “why didn’t he hug me before he left this morning?” When in reality you know everyone was late and he was running out the door to try to be a little more on time.

    The Bible tells us to “not lean on our own understandings” and it is very correct in that. Our minds can trick our reality of things. It can damage a good thing very quickly. Unfortunately we all let it happen often and most of the time we don’t realize it until its too late, if we even realize it at all.

    In looking at all of this, all I can think about is the Big Daddy Weave song “Redeemed.” He starts off that he is haunted by his past and how God tells him to stop fighting and let Him do it for him. Then he goes into being redeemed and shaking off the heavy chains. How he isn’t who he used to be.

    Isnt it freeing and comforting to get the weight of your past off your shoulders? When you give it all to God and He shows you his grace and mercy, you finally get to start your journey of redemption and transformation.

    Redemption means the action of saving or being saved from sin, error or evil. While transformation is a thorough or dramatic change.

    When we have been redeemed and are in the next part with transformation, that’s when we get the most attacks on our faith. Its up to us to be strong in our faith and not let it shake us. That involves not falling into all of the traps. We have to be vigilant about what music we listen to, what shows we watch and even what post we like on social media. They all can have a negative effect on how we see things. The bad you put in, will come out bad but the good you put in, will come out good.

    Im in my transformation now and I know that it will be a constant thing because we always want to grow. In doing this though, I see how one old song in a store, or one post online can set me back in that. I rely on Gods grace and mercy to get me back on track. I have noticed more now when I get off track and I pray about it, ask for guidance and work on getting right back to my transformation. It all gets easier as you go so just keep working at it.

  • Embracing Submission

    Embracing Submission

    This post has taken me three days to write. One, because I’ve been studying this subject and putting the new things I have learned into action. Two, because my kids were needing some time with me. The life of a wife and mother never stops.

    The subject today is Submitting and let me tell you, so many people are scared of this. As I searched things and read forums on the topic, all I saw was a general “I’m not doing that” answer. I’ll admit, I was scared too, but from the new things I have learned, the risk is worth the reward.

    We live in a society where submission to anyone is shown as a prison. Where if we want to make someone else happy, it needs to be on our terms only and usually involves a “what do they do for me” attitude. But what does the Bible say on it and how does the Proverbs 31 woman fit in?

    Colossians 3:18-19 tells us ” Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.”

    Both verses here are different types of Submission. God designed us differently than our spouses to be able to have our own roles. While we aren’t going to really dig deep into the husbands side, just know its there too. God calls women to submit and respect, while He calls the Husbands to love the wife. For women, love is easy. Its what we are meant to do. Men on the other hand give out respect easily. So with Him calling us to do the opposite of what is easy for us, its showing us who we are willing to do it for.

    Submitting is by definition, accepting to yielding to a superior force or to the authority or will of another person. Which kind of sounds harsh. The Bible defines it a little bit differently. It says, to willingly place oneself under another’s authority out of reverence to God, not as a sign of inferiority.

    Doing this for your partner is an act of humility, trust, obedience and surrendering yourself to Gods will, while also working with your partner for Gods will in their life. It shows you truly care/ love them. You are willing to grow and change things that will not only get you closer with them but with God as well.

    In studying Proverbs 31, humility, trust and obedience are three of the characteristics that we are working towards. Sounds hard when you listen to the worlds perspective, but when you look at it from the Bibles way, its actually relatively easy.

    I’m not sure about you but I want to submit to my husband. To have our gender roles and know that He is pursuing the same goals that I am. Trusting that we are both growing in our faith and letting everything else fall into the correct places. Ultimately letting him lead our household.

    Its not always easy to do. Temptation can be a tricky thing, but withstanding it is well worth it. That temporary pleasure of being prideful or doing what you want will not lead to lasting contentment. Temptation will have you comparing yourself, fighting with your partner, comparing them and eventually heartbreak in your relationship.

    Getting past these things with open communication is well worth it though. The past few post we have talked about how its OK to fail sometimes, releasing your pride to gain wisdom, open communication with God just like you have open communication with your partner and surrendering control. As we see God as the leader of our life, we have to see our partner as the leader of the home, the same as they see us like God sees the church.

    To submit doesn’t mean you are losing your freedom. It means you are gaining a better relationship with God and your partner. You are opening up the next level to become the person God wants you to be. I will continue to work on my submission. There will be times I fail but as long as I learn from it, I can go right back to working on it again.

  • Surrendering Control

    Surrendering Control

    If you’re anything like me, its Sunday and you are still fully thinking about the pastors sermon this morning. Ours has been a series called “Chosen to Follow”. It has been so eye opening in how Jesus not only chose His disciples, but also where they came from and how they acted even after following Him.

    The question is now though, How can we relate the Proverbs 31 woman to being chosen to follow Jesus?

    The truth is that we are all chosen to follow Jesus, its just, will you “take up your cross” as they say and go? Will you look at your the ways of your life as half empty or half full? Finally, will you follow by faith or will you need proof?

    When you look through Proverbs 31, we are called to be optimist, to look at the cup as half full rather than half empty. Our cross to bear is our faith, family, home and income. For me and I think most women, this is such a hard task. We balance a lot of things all at once. Our minds are always running 100 mph. For instance, mine is thinking about the sermon, writing this now and listing out my to do list for the day to be prepared for the next week. Throw in answering the kids questions, helping them with task and making sure they are fed and bathed. We sure have our work cut out for us. God made it where we can handle it all though. Even when I feel like everything can be spiraling, we pull through the day. Its one thing that I like to remind myself to thank God for. Every day, no matter how pessimistic I am during it or optimistic in the morning about being ready, I thank God for getting me through it.

    Its so crazy how this is all coming back to how “she laughs without fear of the future.” That’s where we need to surrender. The pastor asked us to ask a question today. “What is one 1/2 empty area in your life that needs surrender?” Mine is this. In those times that I’m overthinking, thinking I am failing or just planning what will happen next, I need to surrender it. I need to laugh without fear of what will happen because He will handle it.

    How to do this though? We have to give up the control to Him. We have to walk in the light of His word and trust His promises. You might say, “if I give up control, things won’t fall into the right places” and that is something that you have to decide, is it worth the risk? What if the places that you think are right are not the places that God wants you to be?

    Isaiah 50:10-11 states “Who among you fears the Lord and obeys the word of his servant? Let the one who walks in the dark, who has no light, trust in the name of the Lord and rely on their God. But now, all you who light fires and provide yourselves with flaming torches, go, walk in the light of your fires and of the torches you have set ablaze. This is what you shall receive from my hand: you will lie down in torment.

    This verse is so powerful to me. How can we fear the Lord and still try to light our own fires (control)? The song, “This little light of Mine” comes to mind when I think about this verse. The light in the song is Gods word lighting our path. Will you let Satan blow out your light, to help you make a light of your own or will you trust and follow Gods light? I don’t know about you, but I am tired of “laying down in torment”. I want to follow what He wants for my life, I want to follow His light.

    I don’t need proof before it happens. There are so many times I look back on in my life and say, if someone wouldn’t have been praying over me, I wouldn’t be here today. The sad part is how long it took me to realize it. Focusing on that will do me no good now though. I just need to praise Him from where I am and take the next step in my faith every time one becomes available.

    In the end, we become more of a Proverbs 31 woman as we work towards releasing control and blindly following. We are able to look at the future and know He is in control. No matter what we face, He is beside us.

  • The Importance of Open Communication with God

    The Importance of Open Communication with God

    Do you think God cares what we talk about when we pray or is he just happy we are praying? This is something I have had questions on for awhile now. Sometimes I’m thankful for things, sometimes I ask for things and sometimes I just don’t even have words so I just kind of ramble. Prayer is our main connection with God though. I’ve struggled in asking are my prayers “good enough”?

    I believe that all prayer is heard by God. That He is there waiting for us to make time for Him. He listens to everything and anything we have to say.

    Jeremiah 33:3 says “Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.”

    This is what is called God’s phone number. Call on Him and He will answer. To me this means Pray and He will always hear you. Then it goes on to say He will show you so many great things that we can’t even think of. He will answer in ways you have never even imagined. Now, it might not always be in the way you want it to go, but trust the process. When you trust Him, His plans are always better than what you even imagined.

    Proverbs 19:21 states that “Many are the plans in a persons heart, but it is the Lords purpose that prevails”.

    Lets go back to wisdom over pride from yesterday. The Proverbs 31 Woman can laugh at what is to come because she knows Gods plan is greater than her own. That is true Wisdom, trusting God to work in your life and not leaning on your own understanding.

    Our prayers should reflect that. Say the things you want to happen, thank Him for the things that have happened and then tell Him how you will trust whatever His plan for your life is. Give it all to Him in prayer. He wants your ALL, not just a small portion of your day.

    All in all leave the day open for prayer. Be honest and have integrity because he knows your heart. Last of all trust His plans above your own. He will never lead you astray.